Paris vacation V – what’s in a name?

The more I visit Paris, the more confused I get by the many names with which Parisians label their restaurants. I’m hoping someone who speaks fluent French and has some serious experience with eating out in Paris can help out here, but I’ve compiled a list of the different types of “restaurants” and what I think their label implies.  I’m probably way off base on a couple.

Bistro(t) – This is a smallish place, usually closed between lunch and dinner, with a small, often creative menu based on classic French foods and techniques. I’ve failed completely in trying to figure out when the “t” is used and when it isn’t.

Brasserie  – A brasserie is often (much) larger than a bistro with a more standard menu and usually open all day.  The word is derived from the French for “brewery” and relaxed vibes and dependability are far more important than culinary creativity.

Salon de thè – The phrase literally means tea room, but it is a place for coffee, tea or other light beverages with desserts or light sandwiches.

Cafè – A cafè can be almost anything from a brasserie with a unique name to what Americans would recognize as a version of a coffee shop with espresso instead of the type of coffee Americans favor.

Restaurant – The guidebooks say “restaurant” implies a “grand repast” but I’ve seen the word applied to ordinary eating establishments, especially when a foreign cuisine is involved.  For example, a Restaurant Libanese or a Restaurant Chinois. There are also restaurants that are haute cuisine.  Who knows?

Auberge – An auberge is a country inn, or a restaurant designed around the image of what a country inn should look like.

Bar – A French “bar” about halfway between what Americans mean by “bar” and what Italians mean by “bar” – a smallish place dominated by a zinc bar for people to stand up and drink wine, espresso, beer, or whatever while snacking

Bar à vin – This is nothing like the bar described above, but more like a bistro(t) that is open all afternoon with the addition of an extensive list of wines by the glass

Bar à huitres – And to continue on a theme, this is literally oyster bar, a place that specializes in fresh shellfish (oysters, snails, whelks, lobsters, langoustines, etc.), usually at haute cuisine prices and not necessarily featuring an actual bar. The most expensive meal I’ve ever eaten in Paris was an a bar à huitres.

Relais – I have no idea what the word “relais” really implies. The word itself means “relay” in English and according to the etymology, it comes from places that served food at stage coach stops where the horses were changed (hence the relay). However, I doubt that stage coaches ever figured into Relais L’entrecôte, Paris’ most famous steak house chain or Relais Haussman, where we had two magnificent salads for lunch in the chic-est of settings in the chic-est of neighborhoods.

Comptoir – This is another one that baffles me.  Comptoir translates as “counter” as in sales counter and just when I thought I had all this figured out, I saw a store in the 10eme arrondissement named Le Comptoir that was a hardware store.  In culinary terms, though, as far as I can tell, a comptoir is (a) expensive, (b) creative, (c) on the small side, and (d) not open until 7:30 pm.  In other words, something like an expensive non-traditional bistro(t).

Taverne – This is likely a hybrid of sorts, but the taverne we enjoyed was dominated by a zinc bar, had about a dozen tables (if that) and great sandwiches and salads.

l can easily imagine that a place serving medium to pricey food with no more than 20 tables could be a bistro(t), a cafè, a restaurant, a relais, a bar à vin, a taverne ,a comptoir, or even an auberge. If this place had more than 20 tables, it could be a cafè, a restaurant, a relais, a bar à huitres, an auberge, or a brasserie.

Charles de Gaulle was once quoted as questioning how anyone could govern a restaurant that had 246 kinds of cheese. I wonder what kind of language comes up with at least 12 (I’ve probably missed some) ways of categorizing the same thing.  Let me know any I’ve overlooked.